5 ways to raise healthy daughters - Kristin Anderson

---

--DOWNLOAD BLOG MALL NIGERIA APP--
Connect all your favorite blogs and website in one app. Get latest post on the go
Download on Playstore Here

---

---

How do you help your daughter develop a strong self-esteem? Here are five tips.

Last month, my best friend introduced me with concern that Everyone is calling her a "beautiful" two year-old daughter. Her concern was, "I have the impression that the world only perceives her appearance and tries to emphasize her exterior appearance, not the right force."

I can imagine people who tell a friend and daughter that they just need to relax because they have a stick. However, most of my professional life I spent with children and adolescents with eating disorders and dysmorphic disorders of the body. I stood outside the bathroom listening to the thin 14-year-old girls who forced to vomit because they did not think they were thin. I've seen some clever girls cut off their wrists because they've earned ten pounds. They are injured by these girls. My parents hurt me. I help the youngsters of this obsessive generation who will, according to A. Chris Downs, receive around 5,260 attractive ads per year (or at least 14 daily).

How can this be caught? Can my parents, like my friend, create a girl with a healthy body image without moving to the Amish country? Here are the five keys I learned during my studies, my professional experience as a social worker, my childhood and, most importantly, my experience as a mother of pretty girls.

1. It starts with you

Peggy O'Mara once said, "The way we talk to our children becomes their inner voice." Nothing is more true. Your daughter looks to you for guidance on making sense of the world, making sense of herself and her purpose in life. If you cut her down, she will forever fight that voice in her head. Your voice. Raise your children up. Tell them they are beautiful but more importantly, tell them they are intelligent, kind, and worthy. Last week I took my three year-old daughter to the doctor for a routine check-up. The first thing they did was put her on the scale. I asked her, "How much do you weigh?" to which she responded, "Just right." The nurse was shocked. I smiled and said, "That's right," and I had never been more proud.

2. Be gentle with yourself

Kids learn in three ways; example, example, example. Your daughters are looking to you on how they should behave and feel. They say that the biggest indicator of how far a child will go educationally is how far their mother went. If you get your PhD, chances are your daughter will too. The same can be said about body image, if you feel fine about your body, chances are your daughter will too. If you do struggle with body issues, counseling can help you feel better about your body. The healthier you become the healthier your daughter will be.

3. Be gentle with others

Speak kindly. In Matthew 12 it reads, "On the day of judgment people will give account for every careless word they speak, for by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned." Whether you believe in The Bible or not, this is good advice. Be a parent who doesn't speak poorly of those without "ideal" bodies. Study the immensity of the universe, study Christ's teachings, study the butterfly effect, or read Man's Search for Meaning. There is so much good to learn, who has time to spend criticizing the shape of someone else's body?

The size of a person's stomach does not give their life meaning. The number on the scale does not define you or anyone else. The same day my daughter shocked the nurse we played at our local children's museum where we overheard two moms talking in the tot section about their next diet, the ugly parts of their bodies and form-fitting underwear. I usually don't talk to strangers, but I did that day. "Excuse me" I said shyly, "I don't mean to interrupt, but you two are so perfectly beautiful. Why do you worry about things like that?" They were almost speechless. I don't think they knew they were beautiful.

4. Be ready to talk

When questions do come, and they will, be ready to talk. We live in Oklahoma which is not the nation's healthiest state. When my daughter comes to me about body size differences we don't talk about attractiveness or body shapes. We talk about having a healthy heart. We talk about being physically strong so that we can do the things that our family values (basketball, hiking, horseback riding). We also talk about how other people value different things and how it is incredibly hurtful to talk bad about another person's body. People are sensitive about their bodies, the media makes sure of that. Raise your daughters to be a force for good in the world, to see the strengths in others rather than just a pant size.

5. Be a stinker about media consumption for as long as you can

Studies show that by first grade our personality/identity is formed and doesn't seem to change much throughout our lives. I know that the shows children watch, the games they play, and the songs that fill the room DO shape your daughter's life. Be watchful. Guard your children. Teach your children. Be an example of what and how much media to consume.

In the end, we cannot control everything our daughters think, feel, and do. They will make mistakes, and goodness knows, so will we! But at the end of the day, we have the privilege and responsibility to heavily influence the first few years of our daughters' brain development, which are apparently the most important. Hopefully, these steps help vaccinate your daughter against unhealthy body image.

Editor's note: This article was originally published on Kristin Anderson's blog, Candy House Blog and on Familyshare.

AD-Place Ur Text Link Advert Here/Advertise Here